I am not bitter.
But I do detest Valentine’s Day. I’m consistent though- I also can’t stand Mother’s Day, Father’s Day, Thanksgiving- basically any holiday that implies that we should treat people specially for only one day of the year. Don’t get me wrong, I still get my mum some flowers and a nice card in May and if I’m dating someone, he gets a present on that random day in February. I’m not trying to make a political statement. All I’m saying is I think we should all be nice to everyone all the time without having to be told to do so for one specific day of the year by corporations and/or irrelevant ancient rituals.
It means a lot more to me when a friend comes up to me and says “Hey, you look like you’re having a rough day. Let’s get coffee.” than when some poor guy I’m dating spends loads of money on a bunch of roses (I prefer jasmine), an expensive dinner (I really like cooking), and jewellery (…okay, I do like jewellery) on some random day just because society expects him to. Seriously.
Holidays like this promote the idea that it’s not important to do nice things for people all the time. It’s the equivalent of cramming for a final exam- you can do nothing all year, but on one day if you go absolutely crazy it still works? I don’t think so. It’s a karmic fail. Not to mention the idea that this is all bestowed upon one person! Aren’t your efforts better spent treating friends to lunch every once in awhile or even just taking the time to call someone you don’t get to chat with too often? Wouldn’t you rather be invited over for dinner on a random rainy friday night just because instead of having ridiculous expectations for some grandiose gesture on one very specific day of the year? Where’s the spontaneity in that? Where’s the excitement? Honestly, I would be happier to get smiled at by a stranger on a day that I wasn’t feeling so great than having all of those things bestowed upon me on one fateful day of the year. I came upon this article from Women’s Health that shows that I’m not alone in thinking this way, either. Why not give year round?
Look, I’m not trying to rain on any parades here. If you like getting roses and expensive things and going to crowded restaurants, that’s great. Really, I don’t judge you for it any more than I expect to be judged for not liking all that. All I’m saying is maybe we as a society should re-evaluate our priorities in terms of how we spread kindness and treat other people. Don’t forget, in the simple act of giving alone, you receive.